Geez. A whole month went by, whoosh, without my realizing it. A lot of that had to do with all the running around I did since the last time I blogged. And all the uncertainty of life that goes with being a military spouse. (Wife is currently quite un-pc, what with females in the military and all. ::rolls her eyes:: )

First, the trips. A quite nice visit with an old best friend, a reconnection and time of recollections and comparing notes since we saw each other last. A four day weekend of laughter and sweet memories...including some ones we made. (Salsa dancing lessons, anyone?)

A week and a half later, it's off to Florida for a curriculum conference. I wish I'd have learned more but they slotted me in the wrong track. I'm glad I have last year's work to fall back on because I will do better on gut instinct than anything I learned at that conference. Still, I learned a lot about what Teddy will do this year. And I had fun, though it was VERY good to get home. The huge amount of estrogen that surrounded me was getting to be a bit much. Out of fifteen-hundred odd people (yes, that pun WAS intended...all preschool teachers are odd) maybe ten of them were male. And none of those were in MY group.

So I'm back home, and we've completed our pre-planning week. Tomorrow, school starts, and there will be thirteen pretty little faces staring up at me. I will be back where I belong. At least for this year.

As for our military woes...well, we were dangled about for nearly eight weeks before PERSCOM finally made a decision about our future. There had been talk of us having to move in January, but it was all very much up in the air. We didn't really want to go then, but you go when you're sent. Our personnel manager kept promising to let us know for sure on "such" a day, and that day would come with him knowing nothing. First, there were three officers vying for the job. Then it was changed; then it wasn't. They stabilized John, then destabilized him. It all came down to a final decision by the New Mexico Adjutant General, who finally decided to make the job have a June report date, and that slotted one of the other officers into the job. Everything else for January has been filled, so we get to stay where we are until next June, which is a relief. The whole process will start over in January, when they decide who gets what job in June.

And I am in some sort of deep blue funk that I can't explain. It feels like a stone is sitting in the middle of my chest, and it aches, like a nameless dread that has no reason. I want to cry and get it out of me, but the tears don't come. I want to scream and get it out of me. Nothing I do helps. I hope my babies will charm it out of me or love it out of me.

Maybe I'm just tired.

Ever feel like that? What did you do about it?
posted by Steph at 3:15 PM[edit]